I know what I should be doing, why am I not doing it?
Part 1: The Dopamine Learning Trap

How many self-help books have you read? How many Instagram tips and tools have you watched, shared, and even saved? How many shows on life hacks have you watched? Podcasts? How many of those? I bet there were a bunch of amazing tools you’ve encountered, where you may have even said “I need to do this!” And then how many things did you actually do and are consistently still doing? Not many? You’re not alone.

There is a natural high we get from absorbing new information. We get a dopamine hit and that often satisfies or cravings enough for our system to say “I’ve read this, I feel better about it now, no need to do more.” Sound familiar?
Reading that piece about the benefits of meditation, how it’ll calm and rebalance our nervous system is enough to get us out of our emotional tension in the moment, that we no longer have the drive to actually meditate. The challenge, however, is that reading about meditation does not equal meditation.

The publishing and social media companies thrive on this actually, because we will come back to buy the new book, look at the next new video every time over sitting with what we already have for the next six months or so, practicing the skills it wants to teach us.
I’ve done it too. I’ve bought a few books – The Developing Mind by Daniel J. Siegel, I’m looking right at you – that are still sitting on the shelf, years later. Each time, in the bookstore, I was convinced that this was the book that was going to alter my life, and they probably all have the capacity to, but for now, they’re patiently waiting. And of course there’s social media. I am also not immune. But I’ve gotten much more intentional over the years.

So, what do we do now? Well, first we have to slow things down, before we dig in and focus. First, we have to catch ourselves. We live in a society where, with every passing year, we consume more and more content, without ever acting on it. Our system wants the “right” book, the “right” post, the “right” podcast that will unlock things in us and it will always feel like we’re missing out on the next big thing. But honestly, there is so much wonderful content out there already that most likely we’ve consumed a bunch of it by this point and we simply need to slow down and sit with it first.

Note: if at any time you run into trouble with staying consistent, do not fret. Consistency is a process that has its own tools and needs to be calibrated and re-calibrated on a regular basis. 

Let’s talk about actual next steps: 

Step 1 – Observing

For the next week, pay attention to how and when you consume new educational content. Write it down. YouTube? Instagram? New books? Simply follow yourself around for a week, nothing to adjust yet, no judgement either. Just be present to yourself.

Step 2 – Adjusting

For the second week, choose one thing you found helpful and would like to try. Do that, instead of consuming new content. So if you notice that you watch YouTube videos for 30 minutes a day, you have just freed yourself up to do try the new habit, 30 minutes a day. Note down each day how it went.

Step 3 – Re-evaluating

After a week, re-evaluate. Maybe add a few more weeks if you feel the new thing you’re trying could be beneficial in your life. On average habits become automatic after 60+ days, so keep going!